It had been bugging me for weeks. The weather was off-and-on
warm -- not hot but warmer. That meant for my family that there was the
possibility they might sweat and so they turn on and down the air conditioner.
I want to open windows, but they just hit the magic button and the house cools
down. Now I do want them to be comfortable, especially the Mrs. She has occasional
periods of time when regardless of the temperature she is on fire, but I digress.
So what was bugging me – no, not the battle over the use of the A/C -- it was
the filter. I knew it was way past the time to change it, and if I didn't get
it done, it would just be that much harder on the old system. So I went to the
store at 9 o'clock at night and got two of them.
While I was out, I got to thinking about who would do all
that stuff if I wasn't here to do it. If I wasn't here when the wood trim
needed to be replaced or the dryer wasn't drying. I suppose it is all relative,
and there are plenty of service companies offering the help. But thinking about
it, I just felt like there are a lot of things I do and that I should probably
write a manual in case something happens to me.
Chapter One: Mechanical and Home. This list of course includes
all types of things like A/C filters and toilet flappers. I would say that
there needs to be a regularly scheduled walk of each room and facility. Check
for loose screws on doors and knobs, check for tight mounting on toilet paper
holders, check for dryer vent cleanliness, light bulbs and window screens. The
gutters, French drains, fertilizing of the yard and bug control need to be in
this chapter. Gas for the blower, mower and weed eater needs to be available
but not overstocked and never, never leave fuel in the equipment for a long
period of time.
Chapter Two: The Partnerships. The obvious ones are at work.
Deadlines, scheduling, creative elements and meetings. This is a tough one. I
guess that a look back at my day timer would explain a lot, and a blanket email
to everyone on my contacts would get some of it done. But these are the things
in life we are just set out to do. We can be replaced, mostly, for the tasks,
but our creative and personal touches are hard to match if we are truly engaged
in what we do.
Chapter Three: The personal part of the manual is going to
be really hard to get everything down.
Again, the mechanical decisions will happen. The tire for my daughter’s
truck or a baseball bat for my son. The financial can be taken over by mom. Moms
do this stuff all the time. The bill payer who sneaks a few bucks into a
savings account each month or handles the taxes and knows the nuances of the
family CPA.
But it's the male figure, the father leading the family, final
answer, decision maker, the real dad stuff. It's the arm around my boys when
they need a guy to tell them job well done. It's the conversations on the way
to school each morning with my boy, a dad praying over his son, blessing him,
encouraging him before he steps onto the school grounds. It's those times only
dad knows when to push the boy to do just a little more, stay on it, go, lift,
hold, run, stand, look, do hard things. How to use a hammer and the importance
of opening the door for a girl. To listen to a business plan or a struggle in
his first years of marriage. To celebrate the victories, successes and joys
with him guy to guy.
This section has to find a way to fill the needs of my
daughter too. How to comfort a daughter who needs to know safety is only as far
away as daddy. A daddy is the hard guy who says no but hugs her and tells her
how proud he is of her and how beautiful she is. Who teaches her to do hard
things, to stand strong in her convictions, shoot a gun, gut a deer, buy auto
parts. Daddy teaches, shows by his example, to never settle for a guy who does
not open her door or want to meet her parents, go to church or listen to her.
How do I explain the little nuances I have learned about my
wife over the last 20 years that are absolutes. Movies, dreams, favorite snacks
and workout tapes. The joy she gets from cleaning the house and that there is
one laundry soap allowed.
Chapter four: warranties and guarantees. There are so many
examples in the Bible where only God had the answer. Where He was the blessing,
the caregiver, the rock, the joy, the guide. The only way I can figure out how
to get chapter three to work is to instill the heartfelt knowledge of our
heavenly Father in my kids and for my wife to feel it from me while I am here.
For them to know He is there no matter what and by that they get strength to go
to Him for comfort and direction and find a safe haven.
This is really the most important part of the manual. It is
the last chapter that should probably be the first. God is the Guy who services
the warranties and guarantees. He even wrote them down for us (Bible) so we
would have them handy.
I guess it boils down to: There is an extra a/c filter in
the closet, fertilize two times a year, and as my buddy Joe Don Mayes always
says, "Read the Bible; do what it says". Seems simple, right?
