Monday, February 1, 2010

Love and Money the Oldest Profession

The oldest profession in the world is held by women. They have been in the business since early on. The trade is not necessarily lucrative, and I am amazed at how many women choose it as a career path. I love that they do; I am a big fan. My wife loves it, and if she could, it is all she would do.

What -- you thought I was talking about … oh no way. I mean a mom, a wife, the keeper of the home. Eve was the first mom, wife and the grandmother to us all if you go all the way back. In society today, the mom is the rock. She is the one the guys yell to when they win the Super Bowl or World Series. It is always the wife or mom whom even the biggest ole’ boy wants around when he is sick.

The wife or mom is also the one in control of certain things most guys won’t touch. Take the grocery store, for instance. I am almost, just short of, evil-eyed close to not allowed to go. I will get a list or a call for a loaf of bread or gallon of milk. I will get the occasional call to pick up a few big steaks or diet soda. Beyond that, it is no use. I am not wanted in the grocery store aisles shopping for our home.

I tried going with her a time or two over the last 16 years; not gonna make that mistake again. When she goes, it is a slow process where she compares, experiments, works up and down the aisles in a very deliberate fashion. I say let’s rock this out and get home -- wrong. She knows what the kids need, what the house needs and what I might need.

Coupons are a big deal. If she does not get back $10 or $15 in coupon savings, she feels like she did not do well. Another very interesting sniglet is if she has, say, $200 to spend that day, you can bet it will be almost to the dollar, after coupons, without a calculator. I don’t know how she does it; she just does.

When anyone is sick around our house, it is always mom who gets the call. Medication is strictly controlled by her, and she knows who reacts and how. She knows the substitute drugs and homeopathic cures as well. Chicken soup, cold wash clothes, heating pad, oatmeal bath, stay home from school -- all the doctor’in is from mom. I am for that in a big way, especially when I am not feeling well.

Most guys I know just slam some painkillers or cold meds and hammer on down the road. That is what I do. However, when I am really sick, she steps in and takes care of me. I have noticed, though, that after all these years, some of the glamour of taking care of the old man has worn off and she has been known to cut corners. I have even had her tell me she was leaving to run errands and was not sure when she would be back while I laid on the couch sick. How could she be so cold? It could not possibly be that I am being a total un-nice sick person?

Home decorations are another thing moms are in charge of that most guys don’t have a say over. My wife has an affinity for rugs. Seems every other week she has a new rug replacing the old rug from the week before. Candleholders, picture frames, towels, tablecloths, drinking glasses. Things. I don’t know how much they cost. I don’t ask how much they cost. I know better than to go there. She spends money on things I see as frivolous and silly, but they make our home a home and that is what moms do. They nest. They create a home inside the cave, the teepee, the wood frame box with sheetrock on the walls.

Moms are the ones who love things that don’t make sense to anyone. They take the scribbled-on construction paper and put it on the refrigerator door. My wife kisses every card our kids have ever given her, paper, note or whatever before she disposes of them, if she ever does that is.

Now, it has to be said that moms love to be cared for as well. I have talked about scrubbing the big pots in the kitchen before. When we have large pans or pots dirty in our kitchen, I jump in and clean them. Motivational speaker Zig Ziglar talks about how he will take his wife’s car out early Saturday morning and fill it with gas, run it through the car wash, change the oil. These are things she could do, but he does them as part of the care he shows for her. Moms need to hear they are appreciated and feel they are appreciated. Kids don’t always understand it until later, but, usually, they figure out that mom was a pretty big help when they were young and dumb. I know I did.

The Bible talks a lot about moms and wives. It tells us just how much of a blessing they are. Any real man worth his weight knows that his wife, the kids’ mom, is a machine and deserves a Golden Globe, a Heisman, a Red Cross Safety and Medic award, a Purple Heart and a slew of precious stones in her crown when she gets to heaven.

Tell your mom you love her; hug your wife. Teach your boys to honor their moms and one day wife.

TJ Greaney