Transformers Transforming Our Kids?

There are some amazing things they pull off in today’s movies. I love the animation and the camera work. I really enjoy some of the creative ideas and even the remakes of a lot of the classic films and books, great stuff. My wife is really the movie buff at our home, she remembers the names of the stars and the movies they played in. She also knows who is dating who. I know John Wayne when I see him, Steve Martin, maybe a few others. I know John Wayne is dead but no clue who Steve is dating.

Recently I took my 11-year-old son to see the new blockbuster Transformers. There was a lot of cool animation and special effects. There was also a lot of offensive language and sexual references that just made no sense to me at all. The bad language came from all sides and I could not once, not once, accept it as part of the plot line or as a necessary part of the action. The sexual connotations were also unwarranted and could have been left out without affecting the story line.

I have written scripts for television, radio and other video media, the last client did 2.5 billion a year in sales and their TV scripts were very important to them. I never once found the need to include anything even close to what the movie Transformers had as what seemed to be a staple by the writers. As a writer I wonder how they could be that hard up for a story line or just lacking an educated vocabulary.

Now you take this movie and the offensive parts and feed that to kids through the mega meal deals at the fast food restaurants and soft drinks, you feed it to them every 15 minutes on the kid’s channels on TV and you have everyone convinced it is OK and kid friendly.

This movie is only a small part the transforming of the American culture to a lewd, selfish, uneducated and all me society. Take ABC Family channel, who made that up? That channel has some of the worst shows you would ever want to expose your children to, namely promiscuous teenager’s alamode. Is that really how people want their kids to act, really?

I have a friend who home schools his family and they don’t have TV or any of the internet or video things in their home that transport this type of information. I really thought he was off his rocker when I first met him. I am not so sure he is not making the right decisions now. He feeds his kids at a slower more deliberate pace. It makes a lot more sense to me the more I think about it.

This is not unusual or new. Society as a whole has hungered and accepted the next perverted or dangerous act for years. We have allowed the content to permeate our families, the schools, politics and it goes on and on.

Hey, I am no perfect angel. I catch myself being drawn into these shows and I slip and use language I am not proud of. I don’t hold folks up who get caught up in the heat of the moment. I do however dislike the planning and executing of language and sex in places where kids will be exposed to it. Yes, I know, so don’t take your kids to that stuff then you hypocrite, I can hear it and it is true. Maybe next time I will prepare myself better, be a better parent and guardian. I pray for Gods wisdom and strength for that every day.

Mean Old Guy.......

I have told of my grumpy and self-absorbed spirit before. I am not sure where it comes from but it is a fight I have had with myself for years. Many times folks will complain they have been mistreated one way or another to justify their mood or disposition. For me, I am a 50-year-old adult male. From here on out if I have a problem, it is my problem. It is up to me to fix it or change.

One Sunday not long ago I was in one of those not real cheerful moods and I walked into church, stood there, then walked back out. That day I had my wife’s little jeep and the top was off. I got in the jeep and just started driving.

When you have the top down on a jeep, the radio or music is not much of an option. As I headed out into the countryside it was just me, the sun and God cruising along. Now I believe if you listen God will speak to you. It can be in all types of ways, sometimes even audible. On that Sunday as I was asking Him to please help me figure out why I was so mad, He spoke. He said go buy a can of Coke. Not the bottle of diet Coke with lime that I like, it was a can of regular ole Coke.

I was pretty far out into the country driving down a small paved road thinking I needed to find an old country store and get the Coke. The sun was warm and the air was cool. Just ahead of me I saw the top of a small white church, I passed it slowly and noticed the door was open and there were two cars out front. Up and around the curve and there was a highway. I turned right and quickly found a convenience store. I walked in slowly and purchased the soda. All the time I was wondering if I should buy a lottery ticket or if someone was going to walk up to me and say something profound to change my life. Nothing.

I got back in the Jeep, pulled to the gas pumps and filled it up. Nothing, nobody. I eased out of the drive and headed back to my country road. Then He started to speak again, He told me to go back to that church. What, what was He talking about. But the Jeep turned and I ended up in the grass and gravel area in front of the tiny church. I pulled under a tree, motor running and sipped on the drink. I told myself I had no business being there and there was no way I was going near a strange little church in the country. Then He spoke again.

He told me to go introduce myself to the two older men on the porch. Reluctantly I backed up and parked, got out and walked to the porch. There on the white painted porch I met the pastor and one of his congregation. I told them I had no idea why I was there but I did not want to be at my church that day and I wanted to at least be nice and say hi. The next thing I knew I was sitting in a pew in the back of the church when service started.

All six or seven of the men met up front, invited me up and then prayed before the service. We all sat back down and several of the ladies began to sing and it was beautiful. The pastor introduced a member who spoke that day on how he had been blessed recently and how he knew it was only by the grace of God and the presence of the Holy Spirit that he was there speaking.

I introduced myself at the end of the service and gave thanks for the Lords direction. I drove home back down that country road and into the bustling city. I was overcome with Gods hand on my shoulder that day. He helped me realize another piece of who He needs me to be, who I need to be. Eight strangers spoke into my life words of wisdom and grace, kindness and love.
We all have demons and life experiences in our closets. We all have hardships and struggles, all of us. Now you may think the guy with money or a pretty wife doesn’t have near as bad, it is all relative. The one thing we can all do that is the same is to choose to not go there. We can all choose to pray for God to give us the wisdom and heart to change who we are and how we are. He can do it, I know He can.

As far as that Coke in the can that day, I don’t have a clue. Maybe I was just thirsty, maybe I needed the extra sugar boost, maybe God will reveal it later. All I can say for sure is the soda was good, the church service was as close to God as I have been in a long time and one day, in the not too distant future, I will be back sitting in a pew at the small white church in the country.

God also spoke to me that day and reminded me that (Proverbs 29:11) A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control…….

Friends

The thesaurus here on my laptop says that a friend can be a pal, a buddy, acquaintance, comrade and even colleague, helper and ally. My friend from Australia calls me Nancy, I think its a term of endearment from his side of the globe. I call him Bubba.

I don’t think I make a very good friend for the most part. I don’t always remember birthdays or special events. I don’t call regularly just to check in and see how people are doing. I have friends that do, guy friends, they are awesome that way. Honestly, it seems for me, life just goes by and I don’t think about it. I try to put it off as a guy thing but that really won’t get it because some do.

I hear that on Facebook , Twitter, Myspace etc., all those social networks, it is about how many friends you can gather. There are a lot of television and media types who have millions of friends. I do understand that is just a term for fan or obsessed person with nothing else to do. But I bet there are those who feel that they are truly connected to that person on a more intimate level, their buddy, pal. I bet it even become more of a problem for celebrities and their fans wanting to get “closer” be cuase they follow them on “twits, or tweets, or peeps” – or whatever they are called.

Jesus had a lot of folks who followed Him and helped Him. I think He probably considered many of them friends and loved them for caring about Him and others. His fab 12 were closest to Him. They shared intimate conversations and I can just see them walking for hours down an old dusty road, hot, thirsty, sweaty. “Man it’s hot out.” “Yea.” “Do we have far to go.” “Not sure.” “Man it’s hot out.” “Yea.” Friends can have a conversation like that and it is fine, especially guys, friends just know each other.

Ladies friendships are so way beyond what most guys can muster. They have to plan time together. They talk for hours about things that they talked about just a week before, or an hour ago. They get excited if they meet another woman and might have a new friend in their circle, a new “best friend.” They can brush each other’s hair or share clothes. I don’t know if any of my buddies have ever asked to borrow a shirt to match his boots and belt, well maybe, but just once.

For my best and closest friends we have an unwritten bond, one that time and life have no power over. It is just there (our friendship) and it only takes a minute or two once we are together or talking to hit our stride from 20 or 30 years before. I have other friends who I have not know as long but we love each other’s company, we laugh and joke. I smile thinking about them in my life today. And there are friends who I think we just like each other. We don’t necessarily see each other often or hang at each others homes, but we could.

The human has an innate desire for friendship. They want to be cared for and care for others. Even the worst of the worst crave to be bonded with others in some way.

Thanks, thanks to everyone who came to my 50th bitrthday bash and grillathon. I am amazed at how many folks care enough for me, call me a friend and take a day of their time to come and tell me. Thanks ya’ll.

Friends are more important to me as each day passes. Lord help me to be a better friend to those friends I have now and those friends I have yet to meet.

The Road Less Travelled

When we were growing up my father took us around the country in the old family station wagon. To this day, I believe the adventures we had on those weekends and during the summer are a big part of why I write about, and have a passion for, the outdoors.

The old family station wagon was well before everyone had a pickup, Mini Van or SUV. They were the original SUV Mini Van. We took it up and down the narrow mountain passes. We drove through the giant sequoia tree in Yosemite National Park before it fell in 1969. We sat in the backseat, facing backwards and making faces at the cars behind us.

Mom used to tell us all kinds of things to keep us quiet like, “Chew on a saltine cracker long enough it will turn into sugar.” “If you’re not quiet we will just put you out right here.” We played the “I Spy” game for hours, colored and read books until we were nauseated. And we just stared out the window watching the world and listening to mom and dad talk about all kinds of things.

Dad built a homemade camping trailer. The trailer was flat with compartments that fit different items, like the Coleman stove, tent, food and ice chest. Everything had its place and it worked really well.

I remember once on summer vacation as we sat on the mountainside, a storm in the valley let loose a tornado. We watched it as it whipped and tore through the fields. I was so frightened. My mom and dad explained if it came up close we would lie down in the ditch and it would go right over us. They knew it would not come up the mountain and it didn’t. To this day I wonder if you lie in a ditch if a tornado will just go over the top of you.

On that same campsite on the same trip we had a bear chase a ground squirrel over our tent. It happened in the middle of the night and when we woke the next day we saw the bear paw prints and some punctures on our tent just above where I was sleeping. To this day we have that tent and the paw prints are on it.

America has a long list of must-see landmarks and parks. Rural life is where my heart is. I love driving the back roads through the small towns. I am also one who is not afraid to eat at the mom and pop café. For me, the old saying, “You spend the first half of your life trying to get off the farm and the second half trying to get back to it,” fits, except I was raised in the city. I have an inner longing for the simple things life offers; they seem more rewarding or real.

Thinking, dreaming, pondering, wonder, adventure, prayer, discovery, quiet and simple are all words I want more of in my life. I want my kids to learn to seek adventure and contemplate God in their lives. When Jesus was feeling overwhelmed from his adventures or just needed quiet time, He headed for the mountain, outside, away from the hustle and bustle of healing and preaching and sharing life. He needed to have quiet time with His Father and time to recharge.

When I travel, I get excited to see just who God is going to put in my path. An old shop clerk, a farmer, a shrimper, a couple kids on four-wheelers, each with a story if you are interested and listen. This summer, take some time to explore. Take a Saturday morning or Sunday afternoon drive. Check out a small highway through the country without the radio on. Stop in a small town and have a soda or buy some vegetables along the town square. Listen for God to lead you and know that we live in the best country on earth, and if you are with me, in Texas, the best state in America -- I’m a native. I can say that. Be grateful for the ability to move about freely and without fear. Take the “Road Less Traveled,” see who is there, amazing.

Pot Scrubber

There are certain things that, as a man, I feel required to do or be responsible for around the house. When the toilet gets clogged up, I get the call. When the yard has branches or fencing problems, it is mine. Most of the things my wife or kids could do, but they are left to me because they are outside. All that is fine because I like my time in the yard and I like accomplishing things then sitting back and looking at the results -- many times with a cigar in hand.

My wife has certain things she does that are hers. There are things that she does not want me to touch, and, honestly, I don’t want to touch them. She likes to clean the house. She likes dusting and spraying cleaners and organizing. She will tell you it is therapeutic with a smile on her face.
Before we got married I kept an impeccable house. I was ultra organized, had the laundry done nightly, cooked and cleaned with gusto. It seems not long after we were married those skill sets began to wane then continued a downward spiral to almost nothing. I never intentionally meant to turn over the cleaning and laundry to my wife, it just happened. Don’t misunderstand, I still get asked to help and those times I get asked, I better perform.

There was a period in my life when I spent a lot of time listening to motivational speakers. I had a handful whom I really enjoyed and got me fired up. Motivational speakers can be very positive influences in your life, and if you were to pick up on any one lesson chances are you would grow personally or in business. The two I really enjoyed the most were Brian Tracy and Zig Ziglar.
Brian Tracy really taught me some skills when it comes to selling and professional relationships. I must have worn out two cassette tape series listening to them over and over in my truck. He also taught me how to be organized and efficient with your time -- that I am still working on 15 years later.

Zig Ziglar is my favorite because he uses wonderful personal stories and visual aids to get his point across. For years he carried around a big chrome hand water pump that he would get to cranking up and down to demonstrate a point that I can’t remember.

I do remember one thing in particular that Zig did say that in the last few months, 15 years later, I have begun to implement with conviction. It is not a sales tool or a marketing angle, not really. Zig said he never lets his wife wash the big pots and pans. If she used a big frying pan, stew pot or anything big like that, he hand washed it, dried it and put it away. He was adamant about this.

I started to do this at our house. It can really be a drag on some days. Recently when my wife very lovingly put something in the oven to warm up for dinner, she forgot there was a plastic tray under the foil. The house filled with smoke and the plastic dripped and covered all the racks and bottom of the oven. I rushed in as she worried about the fire and mess. I immediately began the clean-up process that took several hours but resulted in a sparkling clean oven. I guess the oven is a giant pot of sorts anyway.

I know I can always do a little more to help around the inside of the house. This one little gesture, cleaning the pots, has been unspoken to date but then I am not doing it for a pat on the back or a thank you. I need, I want, to be a good husband and the knight in shining armor for my biggest cheerleader. We have a joke around our house that the sock fairy always delivers clean socks right before our drawers are empty. Now I am not one who believes in fairy tales and the likes, but that one is one I am going to believe in as long as I can. If it takes getting to that mystical land of clean and wonderful smelling laundry by including a few inside chores to my side of the list, I’m in.

Bacon, Coffee and a Memory

The six senses are amazing. They can bring you to a place of long ago or create a tab in your life book that you can go back to and savor, morn or reflect on.

Sounds or music can spur a memory that makes you sad or happy. Lots of people can hear a song and get nostalgic. I remember running away from home when I was in Junior High and I rode a bus all the way to Lake Jackson, Texas. At the time it seemed like a thousand miles, really it was maybe 60 or 70. There was a specific girl who I had a crush on that had left our neighborhood and moved there. When I got to her moms apartment I was met by her older sister who told me she was inside with her new boyfriend and I could not go in. I sat on the steps outside and listened as Elton John’s Mad Man Across the Water played through their windows. To this day when I hear music off that record I feel something, sad I guess, it almost always brings me back there.

Seeing something can create a Déjà vu effect that triggers emotions. It is not uncommon to be sensitive to certain things you see that move you to emotion because of your interpretation as a kid. Past experiences with people, places or things can spur you to happiness, sadness, fear. When I see a kid being ignored by an adult I get frustrated, even mad. I remember when I was growing up and it was “kids are made to be seen not heard.” I grew up longing for someone to talk to, not another kid but a grown up. Today I find myself drawn into ministry with boys who are hungry to talk to an adult. Something about seeing a kid being ignored gets me all worked up.

Feeling the soft flannel of a sheet or a shirt, the feeling of a fresh washed pair of favorite jeans can make you feel good. It feels like a Saturday morning with nothing ahead of you but the day. When I feel my wife’s hair after it has just been washed, soft, smooth and silky makes me feel good. I also love to get my back scratched. I remember as a kid begging mom to scratch my back every night and to never stop. Human contact is imperative to life. Touch.

Two of my favorite sensory alerts are from the nose and both of these can typically be found in the mornings. The smell of bacon and the smell of fresh brewing coffee. When I come into the kitchen in the morning and the coffee is already started and the aroma is all about it makes me happy. I don’t have any specific memory or occasion when it became such a feel good sensation but it is one I truly enjoy.

Bacon, yes that lovely pork product. You can wrap bacon around a rock and I will enjoy every bite. Bacon is one of those smells I can catch from miles across a mountain valley coming from a hunt camp in the timber. Once while hunting early one morning in the hill country it crept into my deer blind from the next ranch over, I had to leave the blind early to go eat at our camp.
I truly believe God gives us these extra special tools to use for his good. They can bring us to a special place we may not see but we feel. They can be hurtful sometimes but I do a lot of hard work on myself when I am hurting – a lot of big hit songs came from pain.

Thanks Lord for the sensations I am blessed with and the emotions that come with them. I pray I use the gifts you have given me to honor You. Lord help me slow down to “smell the coffee” each day and oh yea, thanks for bacon.

Broken Cars and Chocolate

It is never good to find a pool of liquid under your vehicle. I know on hot days if you have been running the air conditioner it can be nothing, but most other days, grrrrrrr.

That is exactly what happened Monday morning. The night before I noticed a spot on the driveway, I am a guy, I see those things. I decided it was most likely from someone else’s vehicle because we had a lot of folks over that night. The next morning I pulled up in a different spot and when I got out there was a drip under my engine. I know very little about vehicles but I did know that it was not oil but most likely water from my water pump. Crud, that can be an expensive fix especially on a ¾ ton diesel pickup.

Life goes into a holding pattern for me when a vehicle goes down. I drive a lot and many times out in the middle of nowhere. That is not where you want to break down. Many of the roads have nothing but a ditch to either side. I can’t take that chance and I sure don’t want my wife calling me with car problems when I am out of town.

It took a few phone calls but I had an appointment to have it repaired that afternoon. On one hand it was a blessing, on the other I did not know how I was going to pay for it. I thought I would figure that out as I went along. Stuck at home I was not going to get anything done.
The shop I took it to was on one of the oldest streets in Austin, Texas, Congress. Luckily for me it was at the beginning of the newly revived eclectic parts. Vintage clothing stores, health food shops and coffee houses line the street on both sides. I left the car with the mechanic and strapped on my backpack with my laptop and took off to explore. It was urban exploration at its finest.

My first stop was the resale shop by the Society of Saint Vincent DePaul. I spent and hour looking a worn t-shirts and old records. I could not find a thing I needed but it was cool inside and I had nothing else to do, what the heck. I had a few shirts I thought I would buy until the very end when I put them back and left to continue my exploration.

I walked all the way to the end of the shops on one side then crossed and started back on the opposite side. The shop I was drawn into on that side was the candy & soda shop. I explored each shelf and admired the old candy boxes on display. I could taste the cherry sours, the Clark bars, the Necco’s and the licorice. Now the doctor told me to back off sugar but that just highlighted my cravings. You know what I mean?

I could not resist a handmade root beer and some apple, bacon, smoked chocolate. I made my purchase and found a metal chair along the sidewalk in front of a small city grocery and relaxed with my treasures. I drank every drop of the soda. I saved most of the chocolate for my daughter who just happened to be playing a softball game around the corner right when they finished the truck.

Yes, the day started out pretty crummy, but it turned out good. I realized that the time I had exploring was really a neat chance to think, and pray and be out of my normal element, it opened me up for a great conversation with God. We had a nice chat and maybe our relationship will be a little stronger, I will be a little more open. I sure do need it.